I don't understand 'surprise' pregnancies

I don't understand 'surprise' pregnancies

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I get so confused when I get in the middle of conversations where people tell me their child was a total surprise.

“I was on birth control and everything.”

Yea right. With many birth controls being more than 90% effective, I doubt that.

“Well, I did forget to take it a couple of days...”

AH HA. The truth comes out.

According to USA Today, in 29 states, more than half of pregnancies are unintended. Did that hit you like it hit me? More than HALF! Overall in the United States a whopping 40% of pregnancies are unplanned.

How is this possible? Well, I have a suspicion.

Last year I was talking to a woman pregnant with her third child that was to be 16 months younger than her second.

"We were using natural family planning" she told me. I tried my best not to roll my eyes but I had heard versions of this story many times. I knew what was coming.

"We were in my fertile days so I knew we shouldn't do it but I thought 'Oh I won't get pregnant this one time.'"

For a moment I through I was watching 16 and Pregnant and forgot I was communicating with an adult.

Another young woman in the room said "well you know what if it's meant to happen it's going to happen anyway." Really? I don't believe that. If you abstain from sex, you won't get pregnant. If you use birth control correctly, you probably won't get pregnant. BUT, if you do the deed during your fertile days... You get the idea.

I’m not one to judge, and really, to each their own, but for some reason it bugs me when people tell me their pregnancy was an “accident” or a “surprise” when really they just weren’t trying to be careful.

On the topic of Natural Family Planning... is great and all, but it wouldn’t fly as birth control in my house. Mostly because my husband would never, ever go for it. He’s probably worried baby fever may affect my ability to read my basal body temperature correctly. Maybe my husband knows that which is why he'd never, and I mean EVER go for it.–That and because I keep telling him I want six kids.

I really can't imagine a pregnancy catching us by surprise because we are extremely serious about the decision to have children. I mean, I guess some surprises DO happen. I mean if birth control is only 99.9 percent effective then there is a 1 in 1000 chance it COULD happen. And some days I'm praying I win the lotto and have a surprise of my own so I don't keep trying to over-plan my pregnancies. Still, I think the odds are against me because I already have more than one friend who has claimed this ticket, and less than 1000 friends.

Now, the whole “if it happens it happens” resolve is different. That’s not a surprise either, ok? Maybe it’s not quite trying, or planning, but it’s not preventing either, and if you’re shocked when you get pregnant (unless you have reason to suspect you can’t) then ya may need to take a sex-ed refresher class.

Unplanned pregnancies luckily aren’t all unwanted pregnancies. And so long as the baby is a pleasant surprise, we can take a sigh of relief.

But I’m still scratching my head and wondering why there are so many.

Was your pregnancy planned? If yes and you don't mine me asking, how so? Do you think some people are just pretending to be surprised?

Was your pregnancy planned? If yes and you don't mine me asking, how so? Do you think some people are just pretending to be surprised?

Jennifer is a news anchor and reporter by day. By night, she’s a blogger and wannabe domestic diva. For more of Jennifer’s ramblings, follow @BabyMakingMama on Twitter and read more from her at

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Watch the video: TELLING OUR KIDS WE ARE PREGNANT. Surprise pregnancy announcement! (August 2022).

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